Divorce Court

Go down

Divorce Court

Post  Sere on Wed Feb 03, 2010 12:34 am

This is a story about a couple trying to get a divorce and realizing the entire concept of what they're about to do. Warning- if you don't like divorce, don't read it. But it does end up that people should only marry if they're in love, and divorce is bad. But if you're even against the concept, just don't read it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
CHAPTER 1: WORK
Tera Wey Franklin, 27 year old female, caucasian, wavy red hair, green eyes, bright freckles on arms, face, and part of torso, straightened her collar and went into the New York Stock Exchange building, heels pumping against the floor, expertly dodging the frenzied stock-marketeers, watching specifically the SNS stocks. She nearly screamed in frustration- the rate had gone down 2.87 percent. Tera turned and marched out, going back to the cubicle, wondering how she was going to get a promotion when all her stocks went bad.
Tera Wey Franklin, 27 and three hours older than before, walked through the subway station, riding the escalator up into the slightly chilled late summer/early fall air. She was suddenly glad she had worn her jacket. While walking through the crowd, she pulled out her Blackberry- it had vibrated in her purse. Tera opened the text with a sigh and a little eye roll. "It's Alex, again," she mumbled, pushing an old lady out of her way. Hey, it was New York. People got rough. It was the way it was. Reluctantly, Tera read the text.
To: TerraEarth2727
From: 3somAlex
Text: Hey hun, do we have to go thru w/ this? Dont think its the right thing 2 do. Call!
Tera added the text to a folder. It was labeled as Trash. She shook her head and walked into work, preparing for another difficult day.

CHAPTER 2: HOME

Alex Franklin, 30 year old male, caucasian, black/brown hair, black eyes, lacking distinctive markings of any kind, finally got up from the couch, taking off his shirt, and getting up to play his Wii. In the middle of the game, he glanced at the clock. "Tera'll be here in about, thirty seconds," Alex predicted, making Mario spin right next to Rosalina's skirts like a little perverted kid, laughing when his hand grazed her privates. Thirty seconds later, Tera slammed open the door, going over and flopping down in an armchair, taking off her shoes.
"Well, how was your day doing absolutely nothing?!" She spat at him.
"It was pretty good. I got up about two hours ago, and played my Wii all day."
"When we're finally divorced, you can realize what it's like to support yourself, Alex." Like in any argument, she said his name like it was a curse.
"About that.."
"No about that's! I'm going through with this. I can't STAND you! You shave on the toilet and don't clean up the hairs, you smell, you rely on me for everything, and we haven't even had kids yet! You don't even love me anymore!"
"Now who says that, Tera?"
"I do! The way you treat me!"
Alex rolled his eyes, and went back to his game. Tera made an outraged noise and went to make herself a snack.
avatar
Sere

Posts : 361
Join date : 2008-12-13
Age : 107
Location : I don't have a thinking cap. I have a gun!! >:D

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Divorce Court

Post  Anime_Amanda_ on Wed Feb 03, 2010 3:29 pm

I see how you're using this just as a small intro for personality, looks, but that seems a little role play intro-ish. You want to try and put description and personality into the writing instead of kind of listy. And add on to the chapters
avatar
Anime_Amanda_

Posts : 224
Join date : 2008-12-14
Location : Bikini Bottom, Pine Apple of SpongeBob Squarepants

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Divorce Court

Post  LaBohemien on Sun Feb 07, 2010 2:35 pm

Actually, Amanda, I think it's supposed to be like that. She makes it seem natural and intelligent instead of going on and on and about "Oh and she's really tall and likes hippos." I think it's pretty original how she immediately jumps into their descriptions, and some how bends it into the first scene in the book.
avatar
LaBohemien

Posts : 351
Join date : 2008-12-23
Age : 22
Location : I'm nomadic

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Divorce Court

Post  Anime_Amanda_ on Sun Feb 07, 2010 9:51 pm

That is a very good point, and now that you said that I think if you're able to do either way of description very well, stick to it. So do whatever you're best at, Sere.
avatar
Anime_Amanda_

Posts : 224
Join date : 2008-12-14
Location : Bikini Bottom, Pine Apple of SpongeBob Squarepants

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Divorce Court

Post  Sponsored content


Sponsored content


Back to top Go down

Back to top

- Similar topics

 
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum